I am continuing to read the book Handle With Care by Jody Picoult and I am starting to uncover poignant moments in each of the characters' lives. In this passage, Charlotte, Willow's mother, found out that she may be able to sue her OBGYN on account of wrongful birth. A wrongful birth lawsuit states that if a mother had known that their child was going to be significantly impaired, they would have chosen to abort the fetus. Charlotte is getting in touch with her darkest fears in this passage and questions of morality come up as well.

What if it was someone's fault?

The idea was just the germ of a seed, carried in the hollow beneath my breastbone when we left the law offices. Even when i was lying awake next to Sean, I heard it as a drumbeat in my blood: what if, what if, what if. For five years now I had loved you, hovered over you, held you when you had a break. I had gotten exactly what I so desperately wished for: a beautiful baby. So how could I admit to anyone-much less myself- that you were not only the most wonderful thing in the world that had happened to me... but also the most exhausting, the most overwhelming? pg. 60

Like any loving parent, Charlotte loves Willow, even with her flaws. Charlotte is having trouble accepting the fact that Willow's condition may have actually been someones fault. I love the imagery when Charlotte describes her doubt as a germ of a seed. It makes it seem like her doubt is gradually growing to a point where she will no longer be able to suppress it. Blaming someone specifically for the condition that Willow has to live with. Charlotte must also be feeling guilty for being the one who gave birth to Willow and giving her the disease, even if it wasn't intentional. Charlotte's mixed and confused feelings help add an interesting layer of texture to the unfolding plot.